How to kill a pick-up

- I'm sorry, I said. I've seen you around but we haven't said hello.

- I know, he replied. I see you all the time.

- Oh.

- Like this morning. Were you wearing your pjs?

- Ehh. Well, it was a matter of life and death.

- How?

- I had a no-cat-food crisis at home. My cats are seriously scary when they're hungry.

- How big are your cats?

- Smaller than average.

- How many do you have?

- 54

[Mental note to myself: must stop walking around in pjs]