Your name is WHAT? part 3

My students did a group exercise today. I paired them up. That's how Kinky met Virtuous.

I'm a dinosaur

Four times over the past weeks, I have walked into a tech shop to buy a CD player. Four times I have left empty-handed.

My most recent encounter with a tech sales person started off with a brisk walk to the Ipod docking stations.

-No, no, I said. CDs, not Ipod.

-Oh, but you not put your CD’s on your Ipod?

I don’t have an Ipod. (this isn’t strictly true, I just find it tiresome to use) …and I don’t want one, just a CD player.

Next we ended up by the DVD players.

-Here, CD player.

-That’s a DVD player.

-Yes, play CD also!

- Do you have one that’s JUST a CD player?

- So…you have DVD player already?

- No, I don’t want one.

- Why you not want DVD player?

- I don’t have a TV.

At this point the salesperson stared at me like I was from outer space.

- We have very good offer. TV, DVD, Ipod player blblblablabla…play CD also!

- But that’s like buying a car to light a cigarette.

…and saying this I realised that there is no chance in hell that the sales boy and I would ever understand each other…and I would NEVER leave that shop with a normal CD player. I left empty-handed again.

On a different note: Do cars still come with lighters or have the NO SMOKING police put a stop to this as well? The way they put their noses into everything, you’d almost think smoking was bad for you!

A toilet balancing act

When Chinese girls use "proper" toilets, they step up onto the toilet seat and squat. I know this because there are always footprints, or shoe prints rather, on toilet seats in Hong Kong. I don’t really understand the point in doing this. I am, however, rather impressed with their balance. If I had to balance my heal clad size 40s on an 8 cm slippery surface, I think we'd see many pairs of silk shoes being ruined by toilet water (or worse)...especially in the wee (!) hours of the morning.

Hearing voices

Have you noticed how it’s become ok to talk to yourself in public? When I grew up, back when dinosaurs roamed, we used to laugh and point fingers at those crazy old men carrying on with their monologues. I can’t remember last time I saw one of those loonies. I don't think they have all gone away. I think it is more the case that we no longer react to this phenomenon as half of us are now walking around with a Bluetooth device stuck in our ear.

I only thought of this just now as my friend Snaskefar is going off his blog for a few days but says he intends to carry-on with an “oral live blog” instead. I asked him if the correct term for this isn’t just “talking”? The difference, it seems, is that when you are keeping up an “oral live blog”, you are not to be interrupted.

I was about to ask Snaskefar if there’s any chance he’s one of those nutcase monologue people…only to realise that if this is the case, no one will ever know!

Sleeping with Mao

More on t-shirts...
You might recall that a few months ago I went to my first ever rock festival. My main concern at the time was finding something suitable to wear. My closet is not exactly full of rock festival clothing (not that I knew what that was).

I ended up wearing a, for the occasion purchased, t-shirt featuring a big picture of Mao. I think flashing Mao’s image is about as tasteless as walking around with a swastika on your forehead, but I had two good reasons:

-I thought I would fit right in! Surely Swedish rock festivals are full of communist teenagers?

- It could be a very good conversation starter.

I imagined the conversation to go something like this:

- So you like Mao, hu!
- No, absolutely not!
- Then why are you wearing that t-shirt?
- Because I find it ironic that the biggest icons of communist history have been turned into fashion symbols to increase the wealth of the very same capitalists that people such as Mao fought to eliminate. (In this case Mr Tang of Shanghai)

The problem was that I didn’t meet anyone sober enough to understand that last part…and eventually I wasn’t sober enough to explain it. I ended up being just another communist chick.

Only my friend Hans could see beyond Mao’s face. He took one look at my t-shirt and said:

-Nice boobs!

My Mao t-shirt’s rock festival days are over – it is now sleepwear for all those chilly Hong Kong nights known as “Air Conditioning”.

I saw this t-shirt...

...saying "Che was a murderer and your t-shirt is stupid"

I think that was a good t-shirt.

The nice hypocrite

I have been known to voice my opinion on what not to eat. I generally include shark fin soup, foie gras and whale.

However, it wasn't that long ago I happily gobbled down baby tuna sashimi. I frequently complain about not being able to buy wild salmon in the supermarket. I will not buy foie gras, but if someone else has already committed that sin, then if offered I will devour the dish with great pleasure.

So does this make me a hypocrite? Hell yeah…but I rather like the life philosophy that “wrongs aren't wrong if done by nice people like myself”.